19 Weeks, 4 Days

Well hel-lo, Baby!

It's been awhile since I've written and that's only been because your siblings have kept me so busy!  We were all just on a vacation together and I was either in the pool, watching movies, or catching up the fun photos on my other virtual space.

What did you think about the pool, by the way?  I wondered about you as I was floating around, thinking...is that what it's like for you in there?  It felt so wonderful to be weight-less, feeling so free and unrestricted, enveloped in the warmest of water. 
Though where you are, it's dark. 
Like dark, dark.
I don't think I'd care for that very much.
But you know no different and I don't think you can even open your eyes yet so it really probably doesn't matter to you much.

I remember when I was pregnant with Greer, I started having nightmares about her suffocating in her bag of water.  I told my sister-in-law this at one point and she seemed alarmed, telling me that I should ask God to bless my baby or my dreams or something like that which spooked me even more because she clearly thought that meant something.
I mean, I just think it's the craziest thing that you babies grow underwater!
And I used to think it was comforting but for some reason, it really disturbed me with her.  Honestly, I'm still not totally used to the idea but that's the way it works and it seems to work very, very well!

You're getting much bigger and on vacation I was finally able to feel your kicks with my hand!  Up until now, I've only been able to feel them from the inside because they were pretty slight and detectable only to me.  I don't think anyone else would be able to feel you yet; I have only been able to catch you about three times in the last week but I first tried it one night in the cabin and you hit my hand right away!  It was a sweet moment--maybe because it's just another sign that you're growing stronger and bigger as these weeks continue to tick past us.

There's other things, too. 
Not so pleasant things cause by you but mostly, no different from what your siblings have done.
Bleeding gums and congestion.
Heartburn but only with pizza.  (What do you kids have against my eating pizza?  It's the ONLY food that ever seems to bother you guys.)

I've also started noticing contractions here and there.  Actually, I first felt them about a month or so ago but thought maybe I was just mistaken.  I don't know why I say that because truly I knew I wasn't.  But there are things that aren't "supposed" to happen at a certain time (like my feeling you before even 14 weeks--if you read a pregnancy book, that's UNHEARD of!) so I was just playing along, I suppose.  But they're strong enough at this point for me to totally take notice.  Not strong in a scary, this-is-bad way but strong in a my-body-is-just-revving kind of way.  They're just practice rounds right now but it won't be so long now before they'll start doing real work.

Yesterday in the shower, I noticed that the joints in my pelvic bones are starting to loosen, making raising one leg to shave very uncomfortable.  This is typically a side effect of pregnancy that gives me a lot of trouble later on when they REALLY loosen to make room for you because it just doesn't feel great to lose that flexibility.  If I try and raise my leg too high, there's a sharp pain that tells me to knock it off.  I struggled terribly with this symptom when I was pregnant with Chas and realized that no matter how much I complained about it, there wasn't a darn thing to be done.  With him, my body had a LOT of loosening to do so it was incredibly painful at times.  With everyone else, it normally just bothers me at the end.  But with you, everything seems to be a little earlier and a little more pronounced.

Take for example, the root canal I'll be receiving in the morning.
Yes, I said ROOT CANAL.
My gums are always bothered by the hormones of pregnancy but this is a first.
This takes the Crap Cake.
I've somehow developed an infection in my gums that has lead to a tooth that needs a root canal ASAP.
And the worst of this is not the minor oral surgery part.
The worst is the NO PAIN MEDICATION part.
That's for you, my love.
Mama can take any old thing she wants to normally and if I weren't carrying you right now, I'd be off in Lalaland with a Vicodin, happily awaiting my morning appointment.
Ah, but with you, I get Tylenol.
Regular strength.
(Not even extra strength!  This is barbaric, I say!)

Interestingly, both of your oldest brothers gave me tooth trouble as well, with Chas launching the appearance of my wisdom teeth and with Rhyse finishing them off.  (I never had them pulled, despite how painful they were coming in.  I have an absolute phobia of tooth pulling.  I can handle the dentist; I can not handle someone trying to remove an item from my mouth.  No. Way.)
I had no issues with Greer and Creux but then you come along and the next thing I know, I'm having one of the most deadest procedures in all of oral history.
Thanks for that, sweetie pie.  Mwah.

It's okay though.  I'll have a rough week but then it'll be over.
I did think to myself though earlier today...you know, out of the five months I've been pregnant with you, I've really had one feeling-good one.  I was sick from November to January...and now this.
I can only hope that we're working out all of our high maintanence baby issues right now because you're planning on being that chill baby I need so badly.
(Right?  RIGHT?)

You've either picked up my sleep/waking schedule or you're still very disturbed by your loud and crazy siblings.
On vacation, there was a morning that I made everyone breakfast and then sat down myself to chat with them and they were all yammering on about this and that and the whole time, you were just flipping around and pounding away, too.  It was almost like you were contributing to the conversation.  And we're at the point now where if I wake up in the middle of the night to pee, you're up too!  I slink back in bed and then lay there while you explore your habitat, while you enjoy being awake for a bit.  I can still fall asleep with you doing that though so it's not a problem.  Yet. 
And you're doing something really weird in there, something that feels like...crawling?  All day today you've been really close to my belly and I told Daddy, it almost feels like you're a crab, clawing your way up a wall.  It's weird and slightly freaky feeling.
Most times I really enjoy the sensations of your obvious well-being in there but at times, it does freak me out just a bit.
I sit back and think...there is a real live human being totally wiggling around in my body right now.
It's bizarrely wonderful.  (But bizarre is definitely an adjective worth using in this situation.)

Well, I must rest up for my early morning Fear Factor challenge at the oral surgeon's office!
Wish me luck!

(You just woke up and are asking for ice cream and I must say I'm taking a little bit of delight in telling you that you can't have any because you wrecked my tooth.  It's not a punishment, it's a fact.  Cold ice cream on my mouth right now would require your father peeling us off the ceiling.  So...no.  No ice cream for you.  And ow, stop punching me!  This isn't MY fault, my teeth were fine last time I checked!  You're just going to have to settle for a bit of a chocolate bar.  That's all I can find that will seemingly meet your demands while not requiring me to wish that someone would just knock me out.)

Loving you already,
Mama